LIFESTYLE

*The haphazard Spanish Driver… (Five tips to survive driving in Spain, unless you’re of Italian or French descent, in which case you’ll be as a duck takes to water…) * Excerpt from “An Expat’s Guide To Falling In Love” (Not to be taken seriously!)

Road safety in Spain takes on a whole new meaning and can be just as complex as learning the actual language, despite the supposed universal driving codes. Among the many motoring ‘peculiarities’ you will encounter as you try to comprehend and attempt to stay safe on the Spanish roads are a total lack of lane decorum making you doubt which side of the road you’re meant to be driving on in the first place (for the record, it’s on the right). Traffic signs are treated as optional in most cases, accelerating through amber lights the norm, and driving the wrong way up one-way streets or simply backing up in reverse for a kilometre quite the thing. Anything goes when it comes to parking, illegal or not. The same can be noted for the reckless spontaneity adopted when overtaking fellow drivers, achieved, more often than not, without the use of mirrors or indicators.

Does this sound familiar? Then read on. Take notes if and when necessary.

1. To stay on the safe side, and prepare yourself for any hell-bent driving you may (will) come across, deem all drivers as totally erratic and drive warily (your future grandchildren will thank you for it).
2. Driving in main cities can be absolute bedlam: Not recommended for inexperienced drivers. Make sure your insurance is up-to-date, the accident rate for foreigners is quite high.

3. When driving at night, especially in rural areas, watch out for bicycles, donkeys, and horses and carts without lights. Motorists should also keep a keen eye out for pedestrians, especially elderly people, who tend to walk across the road without looking. Or just walk in the middle of the road.

4. When cruising along country roads, don’t be deceived by the quiet lanes. It can get pretty scary, especially when a vehicle shoots past you at the speed of lightning, overtaking you and the five tractors in front of you all at the same time.

5. Watch out for the dreaded ear-splitting motorcycles and mopeds which are a hazard to everyone’s health and safety and break most noise pollution limits.

That said, not all Spanish drivers are inept or loco and driving in Spain can be a pleasant experience… sometimes, particularly when you’re using rural roads, which are relatively traffic-free (except for those five tractors and the donkey).

1. Take your socks off. It’s OK, you can walk around in sandals without socks. Your feet (and pride) will survive and probably thank you.

2. For once, have dinner after 10 pm. The night magic unfolds after 10 pm. Music, dancing, the food is better (because the kitchens are properly functioning, while before you’d probably just be getting a microwave pre-heated meal).

3. Be brave and venture away from the tourist areas (usually two or three streets back from the main promenade). Find a non-English-speaking bar. You’ll also discover you save a quid or two on all beverages.

4. Check out the local food markets (usually held in a “Plaza de Abastos”). You’ll find a bargain or two, and that’s even without knowing how to barter, and looking like your Bob Tourist with lobster-red skin.

5. Know your limit (alcohol, not speed—we’ll get into speed below). One shot in Spain is the equivalent of a triple back home, so if you can knock back six tequilas before you feel a bit queasy, that makes TWO tequilas in Spain. Pay heed to this advice or you’ll end up in hospital.

6. Know your mph from your km. When you see a road sign with 120 as a speed limit, that’s kilometres, not miles. Don’t push the car to 120 mph. After your visit to the hospital for not paying attention to point 5, you’ll probably find yourself behind bars for the night. And drive on the right hand side, will you? That applies to roundabouts as well.

7. If you’re set on going skinny-dipping, for the love of God, try not to go in totally pissed (on two tequilas) and causing a huge scandal. Points 1-6 will have been in vain.

*Excerpt from my current WIP “An Expat’s Guide to Falling in Love.”

Are you looking for a tall, dark stranger?

If the answer is Yes! Congratulations! You’ve come to the right place. Well, except for the “tall” bit. Unless you’re lucky enough to be dating Pau Gasol (A Spanish International Basket Ball player who measures in at 6 ft 10in) there’s a good chance you’ll tower over most Spanish men. But this is good news! It means you can get away with wearing flip-flops all day long and still feel tall. Your feet and calf muscles will be grateful to you too for saving them the torture of wearing three-inch stilettos. And the best thing is, even if you do tower over your Spanish date, (flip-flops or not) they are not men intimidated by height. So really, it’s good news all around!

And of course you’re still left with “the dark stranger,” with sultry, smouldering dark eyes. One look into his deep, penetrating gaze and you’re a gonna. Eyes black rimmed around the iris, with a reddish orange hue surrounding the pupils, flecked with gold and lighter brown rays, will reach deep into your soul. Are you ready?

Before you get carried away with images of Juan Garcia Postigo wining and dining you (if you don’t know who this absolutely lush Spanish actor and model is, go Google him NOW!! and while you’re at it, you may as well check out Marc Clotet, Miguel Ángel Silvestre Rambla and Miguel Iglesias to name but three more Spanish heart-throbs, to give you an idea of what you may stumble across in these hot! arid, terrains) let’s go over some basic clobber you should know about the typical Spanish man.

1. He has no concept of the word “Vegetarian.”

He’ll be like, “But you eat Jamon don’t you?” Jamon is cured Spanish ham, a source of great pride among Spaniards, ingrained in the customs and traditions of all Spanish regions. Since antiquity Spanish have produced dry-cured hams. The first written references date back to the Roman Empire. How can you not eat Jamon?! Don’t even try to convince him you don’t like it. He won’t buy it. You’re better off just saying you’re allergic to the stuff. You’ll get an odd look, but then the topic will be dropped, at least until the next time you go out for tapas when he’ll try to convince you to try it again.

2. You’ll think he’s an alcoholic after the first date.

He’ll drink, any time, day or night! But let me clear this concept. He’s not a drunk really (and certainly not a larger lout), it’s just that alcohol (particularly wine) is part of their culture. Also, Spain is famous for having some of the best wine in the world which perhaps explains why there are so many bars everywhere. In fact studies (Coca-cola 2013) have shown that there is one bar for every 132 inhabitants. In other words, there are about 350,000 bars to choose from. So if all goes tits-up after your first date with a Spaniard, not to worry, you’ll have plenty of places to drown your sorrows in and most probably get chatted up by another hot Latino anyway. So it’s a win-win situation, really.

3. He’s very affectionate, even with new acquaintances.

Let me prep you for what to expect when you get introduced to someone in Spain.  He’ll lean forward to kiss you, (I know! He’s a complete stranger! And it’s not even a date yet! Try not to panic and stiffen up) so despite your reflexes making you quickly step back, you won’t be quick enough. His arm will go around your back and hold you; one quick kiss will be planted on your right cheek and then another on your left, this will be combined with a long hug, a pat on your back and to finish with a quick, complete, body scan (just like if you were going through customs again). This ritual will be repeated again! when you say goodbye at the end of the evening. And it will be the same for everyone. Guys to girls. Guys to guys. Girls to girls. Young, old, everyone joins in. So if you’re a bit particular regarding your personal space, let me tell you now, by day two of group hugs and kisses, any peculiarities will have gone with the wind! and tomorrow is another day…

4. He cooks very well.

At least that’s what he’ll boast. Though don’t expect him to rustle up roast lamb with Yorkshire pudding and apple crumble. It’s just too hot to eat those type of foods, anyway. But he will impress you with a paella for thirty or a 10 kg Spanish potato omelette. This second dish may sound a simple receipt, but just try flipping a 10 kg omelette in your saucepan and see what could happen to your wrist! And be warned. build up an appetite before you sit down for the meal he has painstakingly prepared. He will be totally offended if you don’t eat absolutely everything! A trait passed from grandmother to grandchild and is integrated into his blueprint.

There are actually 171 Michelin starred restaurants in Spain, of which 8 have the highest rating possible, proving that grandma’s cooking has been taught well.

The meal will end with a strong coffee, it doesn’t matter what time it is. So of course your Spanish date will not be ready to hit the sack until the early hours of the morning… Time to get your dancing shoes on…

5. He’s got the dance moves…

And if he hasn’t, he’ll give it his best shot! Just don’t expect any Justin Timberlake or Michael Jackson moves. The closest you’ll get will be someone trying to imitate Joaquin Cortés (A famous Spanish flamenco dancer, native from Cordoba, Spain). Your date will have no sense of shame and will be up on hearing the first “Sevillana” and dragging you with him to the middle of the dance floor. Where you will feel incredible embarrassed for the both of you. Not to worry, Sevillanas are a type of folk music and dance. They are danced by couples of all ages and sexes during celebrations (fiestas or ferias), often by whole families and towns. Which means that there is a good chance everyone around you is too pissed to notice your awkward moves. Just stick your arms up above your head in a sort of karate kid pose and twirl around. You’ll get the hang of it after a glass or two of vino.

Just be warned, if your date really does love Flamenco (guitar, song or dance) and I mean really loves it you may find after a month of listening to Flamenco around the clock you’ll be at your wits end and you will insist that it’s either Flamenco or you. Of course if it gets to that, I may as well be honest and tell you now, you haven’t a hope in hell that he’ll choose you over his musical passion! You’ve been forewarned!

6. He seems to think you’re deaf…

He doesn’t think you’re hard of hearing really, but it will be the impression you’ll get. He will try to make up for his lack of the English language by speaking slowly and turning his timbre up a notch or two. Something he will do in every social event or place. You’ll find yourself sitting in public transport and you’ll be hushing at him to speak quieter, but there is no need. Just pause for a moment and listen, everyone around you is chattering away in loud tones, the odd one out is in fact you.

7. He’ll almost always be late…

Which is great! You get to doll-up without rushing. But not only will his punctuality be lacking for your date, it seems his body-clock, as like most Spaniards, is run on a different time-zone. Lunch will be late, dinner will be even later and when most Europeans have been asleep for two hours, most Spaniards will be still be glued to the TV more often than not watching football. If you can’t stand football, I advise you now, that the first thing you need to clarify when you meet him, even before you ask him his name, is whether he likes football. If his answer is “Yes” don’t even sit down. Just slowly turn around, pretend that you are in fact deaf, and go back the way you came.

8. He’s very family orientated…

If he presents you to his family (which, more often than not, comprises of about two hundred distant cousins, fifty first cousins, countless aunts and uncles, grandparents, a handful of brothers and sisters and of course his parents) it means that this is on! He is serious and everyone will expect you to be wedded and pregnant before the year is up! Congratulations! You have just joined the European Union again!

This post has inspired my Bestselling novel “An Expat’s Guide to Falling in love.” On sale now!

The rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain…

I live in Andalusia, home to the hottest and driest summers in Spain, but in the west, weather systems sweeping in from the Atlantic ensure that it is relatively wet in the winter, with some areas receiving copious amounts of rain. Something that I can personally certify. This year, the rain started back in October and hasn’t stopped!

In October I heard the typical: “Woo-Hoo! Rain at last!” (The joyous cry lasted about a week).

1.Don’t be fooled by the hot summers. It can get very wet and cold.

November came around and everyone was like: “OK, we’re good now. The reservoirs have been replenished.”

2. Even if you’re an expert swimmer, keep armbands on you at all times.

December: There was a shortage of umbrellas and Wellington boots in all the shops.

3. If you’ve got some spare cash, think of investing in a dinghy.

January: Search parties were sent out to capture anyone performing clandestine rain dances.

4. For the love of God, don’t join in in any of these rain dances.

February: The rain turned to snow…OK, whoever pissed off Elsa? Go apologise.

5. Time to stop watching Frozen.

March: I seriously started thinking about moving back to the UK, at least there the houses are accommodated for the cold and rain, not like Southern Spain where you freeze inside the white-washed buildings with their F***ing freezing marble floors.

6. Time to book your flight home.

April: If this rain keeps up, we can all skip Operation Bikini (getting your body in shape for the summer, not the film) … good news at last!

7.Don’t let the rain fool you, it the space of one week it will go from 12ºC to 40ºC (and when that happens you’ll  find yourself fighting the urge to performing really odd dance moves to beckon the rain and then you’ll get nicked! Be warned!)

Good luck!

Small steps can lead to big changes…

If you want to achieve anything, start simple, but always have little dreams in your life that inspire you to keep learning and achieving regardless of age. It’s never to late to learn something new. I often give out fitness tips, but the basic idea can be applied to any new hobby you want to initiate, whether it be learning to play the piano, or perhaps writing that book.

So where do you start?

As I’ve just said, keep it short and sweet. For the next three weeks or so try and find time to do about 25 minutes of exercise 2 or 3 times a week. I’m only asking for 25 minutes, sounds easy doesn’t it?!

Week 1: Just go out and walk. Enjoy it. It’s your time. You’re not mum or dad in this 25 minute walk. You’re not the employee of some multi-international company. For these 25 minutes you escape all of that and become YOU again. If you fancy, listen to some music, just try to use this time as a moment to disconnect from the daily / weekly mayhem. Unwind with each step you take. There should be no stress in your gait. Just positive, assured steps.

Did you know that regular exercise:

1. Modifies you’re nervous system so that you experience a decrease in anger and hostility (burn calories and build muscle whilst boosting your mood).
2. Going for a walk can spark creativity.
3. Regular walking can help improve you’re body’s response to insulin, which can help reduce belly fat. It reduces your blood sugar level and lowers the risk of chronic disease.
4. You’ll keep your legs looking great.
5. Greatly improves gastric mobility.
6. Your other goals will start to seem more reachable.

Have I convinced you yet? And you get all the above for FREE – Bargain!

Week 2: Include a bit of jogging in your walk. Walk for 4 minutes and jog for 1 minute. Repeat 4 times. Finish with a 5 minute stretch.

Week 3: Include a bit more jogging (more!! I hear you say. If you do it right, believe me you’ll be wanting more). Do 3 minutes walk, 1 minute jog / 2 minutes walk, 1 minute jog / 1 minute walk, 1 minute jog x 2. Finish with a 5 minute stretch

If you don’t feel comfortable jogging, keep to walking, perhaps do 4 minutes normal pace and for 1 minute try and walk a little faster, so that there is a change of pace in the actual walk.
If you’re already quite fit and the above is a bit easy for you, turn the walk time into run time and the run time into walk time. This will make it more intense for those who already do regular exercise.

*Very Important: Always remember to go for a medical check-up before starting any exercise regimen and if during exercise you feel pain of any kind stop immediately.

I’ve included three simple stretches that you can do when you get home after your walk / run. But there are loads of great stretching videos on the internet that you can look up which are easy to follow, like: Easy Stretches for Beginners

Let me know how you get on…

And remember, life is taking one little step at a time…Don’t forget to enjoy the journey! 

Related articles:

What drives people to run a half-marathon

The Importance of Physical Fitness & Benefits of Cross-training

Tips to get Fit

Run VS Breakfast in Bed

Little Big Dreams

A lot of you have been following my fitness tips via my newsletter and I promised that in February I would help take your fitness up to the next level. By now you should have completed about 13 weeks of relatively easy exercise. If you haven’t been following and would like to, here’s the link: Cristina’s Newsletter Sign-up

Links to the previous tips:

1. Fitness tips nº1
2. Fitness tips nº2
3. Fitness tips nº3
4. Fitness tips nº4

Before we continue, let me just answer the following questions:

Why is it so important to do regular exercise?

Staying active means keeping your body functioning at a high level. Regular exercise will maintain the performance of your lungs and heart to most efficiently burn off excess calories and keep your weight under control. Exercise will also improve muscle strength, increase joint flexibility and endurance.

Experts recommend working out several times over the course of a week (not just cramming it all in over the weekend which can raise the risk of injury) with varying exercises for the most benefit to your health.

What is Fitness?

Fitness does not only refer to being physically fit, but also refers to a person’s mental state as well. You can help relax your own mind and eliminate stresses by exercising regularly and eating right.

How Can You Become More Physically Fit?

To become physically fit requires a change in life style as well. You will have to incorporate a regular exercise routine in your life and also eat healthier.

Exercising does not have to be something boring and dreaded. It can be something that you enjoy that helps to increase the overall happiness in your life, as well as relieve symptoms of stress, depression and anxiety.

Any type of moderate activity like walking, swimming, biking or organised sports can contribute to your physical fitness. Try to find an activity that you enjoy and will be able to maintain long-term. I base my fitness tips around walking and running because both are the easiest and probably cheapest form of exercise to organise, you just need to grab your running shoes and wear some comfortable clothing and you’re all set to go.

So are you ready for week: 14? I hope so! ; )

For the next few weeks we’re going to introduce a cross-training workout.

Cross-training? “What!?” I hear you say in a panic, “is that some sort of hard-core, military-type obstacle course?” As images of “Ninja Warrior,” pop into your head.

Cross-training is typically defined as an exercise regimen that uses several modes of training to develop a specific component of fitness.

What are the benefits of cross-training?

Reduced risk of injury: Often injuries occur when you over-do a single activity. Joints, ligaments, muscles and tendons throughout your body are under a tremendous amount of stress through repeated movement, and it’s important to give them the occasional break.

Improved total fitness and enhanced weight loss: One of the most common mistakes people make with exercise is repeating the same routine week after week. To continue to improve your fitness level and reap all the benefits of regular exercise, you need to keep your body guessing. Cross training does this for you.

Enhanced exercise adherence. Research on exercise adherence indicates that many individuals drop out of exercise programs because they become bored or injured. Cross training is a safe and relatively easy way to add variety to an exercise program.

One of the easiest ways to incorporate cross-training is to alternate between activities (e.g., run one day, swim the next, cycle the next). But of course not everyone can fit (or afford) all three activities into the weekly mayhem.

*So if we continue with our walk / run routine, doing two or three sessions a week, one will now become the cross-training session which will consist of the following: (Click on the exercise name for images)

• 10 x Press-ups (Rest knees on the floor if necessary)
• 15 x Jumping Jacks
• 10 x Squats
• 10 x Forward lunges (alternate legs)
• 20 x Skipping (with or without a rope)
• 10 x Bench dips (If you don’t have a bench, just use a chair held in place against a Wall)
• 25 x Sit-ups
• 15 x Hip raises
• 25 seconds Plank
• 20 x Swimming

Remember correct posture is fundamental whilst performing these exercises, so you don’t strain your neck / lower back, etc. It’s always best to seek a personal trainer or do a few similar sessions at a gym where the instructor will explain correct posture and breathing for the exercises before you attempt them alone.

*Always remember to go for a medical check-up before starting any exercise regimen and if during exercise you feel pain of any kind stop immediately.

Week 14 – Week: 16.

(You should be aiming to do three exercise sessions per week. 20 – 30 minutes each session).

Day One: 5 minute walk warm-up. Run for 15 minutes and record the distance.   5 minute walk warm-down and stretch. *How far have you covered in 15 minutes? Let’s see if in a few weeks time you can repeat the 15 minute run and improve the distance covered. The ability to measure physical improvement is a huge motivational factor. But only to be repeated and tested occasionally, you can’t expect to achieve a PB (personal best performance) every single time you go out and run.

Day Two: 5 minute walk warm-up. Do one repetition of the cross-training exercises outlined above. 5 minute walk warm-down and stretch.

Day Three: 5 minute walk warm-up. (1 minute run: 1 minute walk) x 5, finish with a 5 minute walk and stretch.

*Don’t record the distance of your 15 minute run during week: 15. Just enjoy it without putting pressure to improve the distance.

If you feel comfortable, do 2 repetitions of the cross-training exercises in week 15 and 16.

Week: 17: Have an easy week. Take the week off or just do some gentle walking or light jogging and stretching.

And most importantly, have fun! (And sign-up for some more fun tips)

Happy New Year everyone!

One week into the New Year and I already know several of my New Year’s resolutions will struggle to survive. Especially the one where I convince myself that it’s time to clear out all the crap which keeps piling up in the house and gets crammed into cupboards or drawers.

For instance, I have one drawer in my kitchen filled to the brim. You open it and out pops half a dozen old batteries, Biros that don’t work, guarantees to washing machines I don’t even own. There are instructions on how to work my oven and microwave (dah!! You just turn the knob don’t you? Or am I missing out on something??). Yet I keep all this crap in this draw which I can hardly close, just in case, because I’m certain that as soon as I chuck the instructions and guarantees (all in Japanese anyway) away, my dishwasher will break down. I say to myself every year, this will be the year I will get organised. I will get files for everything. Colour coordinated from red to violet so that my office makes me feel like I’m sitting amid a rainbow. I will clear out the medicine cabinet of these half empty cough mixtures. Gooey bottles which are so sticky and green the sight of them is enough to scare a cold away and chuck the boxes of plasters that are so old they don’t stick any more.

Then I will revamp the spare room. I say “spare” room as if it is as defined by the Oxford dictionary as a room “not normally used and especially kept for visitors to sleep in” well, I’d like to see my guests sleep on the Black & Decor I have in there and the wood shavings of my latest DIY project. It’s not a spare room at all, rather a magician’s room where all the odd and missing socks magically appear, where the toys that nobody ever plays with end up in and about twenty different towels, and I have no idea where they’ve come from.

By the time February comes around my resolution to be more organised peters out, I tell myself that surely it doesn’t count as a resolution, it’s called Spring cleaning isn’t it? There, the pressure is off, I feel better already. When Spring comes around, it will be put back on the New Year resolution list, and this time next year I’ll have five or six more towels to add to my collection, more wood chippings and several more odd socks.

Generally, New Year’s resolutions are health-based, people vowing to take more care of their bodies in the coming year, give up the booze, the fags and get into shape. Unfortunately about 88% of people fail in keeping their New Year’s resolution, (sorry if the statistics are a bit discouraging).

So five easy steps  to help you get through the year keeping to your goals are:

1. Only make one resolution. (That way if you break it, you only break one! lol) On a more serious note, it’s easier to focus on one goal instead of loads. Put all your energy into that one aspiration. Try to choose a  realistic resolution, preferably one you haven’t struggled to keep previously.
2. Regularly remind yourself of the benefits. If you’re trying to give up smoking or trying to get into shape, remember, though you may sometimes struggle at times to keep to your goal, remind yourself of the health benefits. Of why you want to lose weight or give up smoking, nobody said it would be easy, but the key is to keep focused and not give up.
3. Split your goal into a series of time-based steps. For example, if it’s getting fit, don’t just think of the end goal, which may be running a marathon in two years time, focus on little steps which will get you there. For example, your first 2 km run without stopping, that’s brilliant! You’ve achieved the first step, be proud of yourself!
4. Give yourself rewards for achieving your each step. Every time you accomplish a small milestone in your journey, congratulate yourself. Break the journey up, this way and it will become more enjoyable.
5. Expect to have small set-backs, and don’t make these a reason to give up altogether. You only fail when you stop trying.

If you want to get healthy and fit, sign-up to my Newletter

I give out some fun fitness tips about once a month as well as other goodies and giveaways related to reading.

If you’ve missed fun fitness tip nº 1 -3, you can check them out here:

Fitness tip nº1

Fitness tip nº2

Fitness tip nº3

Fitness tip nº4 will be sent out in my upcoming newsletter next week, so remember to Sign-up so you don’t lose out!

Now after all the Christmas festivities and the stress of choosing a New Year’s resolution, are you ready to wind down with a good book? For a very limited time you can get these books for free or for a discounted January sale price:

For romance click here: Romance
If you fancy hot and steamy reads you can click here: Hot and Steamy Reads